Like lotus leaves

The nasturtium leaves are enormous this year. They float in the wind reminding me of lotus leaves floating above a pond. Cool weather and lots of rain has made it a good year for nasturtiums.

We have more rain coming this weekend so I decided I’d better get out there and do something. My goal is to fill up the trash can before the rain starts. That’s the limiting factor in how much work I can do in the yard. One trash can full. Then I feel as though I’ve accomplished something.

I’m working on cleaning the atrium out to the walls. I’ve made some serious planting errors in there and I want to start over. Dichondra would make a better ground cover than baby tears. You can walk on it for one thing, and it uses less water. Then a couple of perennials with pretty leaves and clean the fountain out and get it going.

I’ve also decided to get rid of the delachampia. It’s looking pretty shaggy, and I have to prune it all the time and the veins brushing my arms gives me a rash. I’m also kind of worried about it being invasive.

Mom’s issues continue to give us a roller coaster ride. One day she seems better and the next I’m wondering if she’s had a stroke. Nothing like s surprise visit to the doctor to brighten your day. Wrestling her, her walker and her wheelchair in and out of the car was no fun, even with the help of her caregiver.

This whole thing is just sucking the life out of me. It’s so emotionally draining. Every once in a while she’s almost herself. It’s like looking at someone deep underwater, distorted and strange. Then there’s an instant when you see them clearly. I want to dive after that glimpse and drag her back to the surface, but I have no way to reach her.

I try to take it day by day, but there are times when I just have to go out and watch the nasturtiums float on the air.

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